No Need To Shave November?

What's all this hype about No Shave November? I understand that it’s for prostate cancer awareness and though it holds no candle to the amount of pink we saw last month, its a great idea to grow your beards out to show that you support the people currently dealing with such a nasty thing as cancer and the hope for a cure to come quickly.

... But what about those of us who can’t grow a beard?

I have nothing to blame but my genetics, but it doesn’t make me feel any better that even after a few anniversaries of my, err, 25th birthday, I still cannot grow a beard, or even come to anything close. I see all of these magnificent hipster beards that were started long before the month of November rolled around and it makes me a little jealous. Not that I would ever grow one, but I’d like to at least have the option.

Like, what if I go on a camping trip somewhere deep into the mountains and my small plane goes down hundreds of miles from the nearest civilization and I have to survive in the wilderness like Alec Baldwin and Robert De Niro did in The Edge for weeks and weeks? They had 5 o'clock shadows before they even got on their plane. No outpost trapper is going to believe that I’ve been foraging for roots and berries and fighting off grizzly bears for more than a month when I come out of the tree line with the face of a seven year old. I’ll just look like a really young, really dirty, ill prepared hiker.

It’s not fair either. I have friends from high school that after three days without a razor looked like Brett Keisel, when they were TEENAGERS!

I had a friend ask me recently why I'm not growing my beard out for No Shave November, which made me laugh because no one has ever used the word "beard" in a sentence directed toward me. The only way you could tell if I had shaved or not well into my 20s was when the sun reflected off the line where my peach fuzz unevenly ended on my cheek. I’ve had the same electric razor since 2006, if that tells you anything. Although Braun is a great brand, any electric razor will last a long time if it's only turned on for 45 seconds every other Tuesday.

I guess it’s not always a bad thing. Getting my ID checked every time I even walk near the beer aisle makes me feel young.

So for all of you who can grow your full, thick, beautiful beards, let it go just a little longer for those of us who can’t. It’s not that I’m unsupportive of prostate cancer awareness and the search for a cure, it’s just that my attempt to show it with MY facial hair wouldn’t be obvious until well after the month of November has passed.