21 Stages of Getting Stuck in Charleston Traffic

Allison Moorman

Because just when you think everything is fine – BOOM, a sea of red tail lights.

1) When you first start your commute and everything seems to be normal.



2) Then suddenly, you see a few tail lights turning red.



3) And the speed of traffic goes from normal to deplorable.


4) Then you see that one a*hole driving on the shoulder to try and bypass everyone.



5) You then check the clock on your dash and see that if the traffic isn’t too bad, you’ll still be able to get to work on time.



6) But, of course, you know that won’t happen, but you lie to yourself anyway.



7) Oh no, you’re starting to approach Ashley-Phosphate Road.



8) It’s time to send the stress text to your boss that you will be late.



9) Oh wow, it seems like traffic is letting up!



10) Wait, nevermind, you’re hitting airport traffic.



11) Okay, that let up relatively fast, though -- thank god you aren’t getting on 526.



12) Oh nice, looks like the guy who was driving on the shoulder wants to get over in your lane!


13) For some reason, traffic is still slow, but after 10 minutes you still don’t see the cause of the problem?



14) You then consult Waze, and it finds you a detour that saves you fifteen minutes.



15) But it ALSO takes you to places of Charleston you’ve never even heard of before.



16) Then you see it -- the Ravenel Bridge -- and you know that this is the final hurdle of your journey.



17) After much mental preparation, you finally make it over.



18) And when you pull into work, you see your other coworkers also rolling in late.



19) You then all gather around the water cooler and commiserate about how bad the drive into the office was.



20) And you promise yourself you will get up earlier to avoid another hour-long commute.



21) But then the next day when you leave early, there isn’t any traffic in sight and you get to work before the doors are unlocked.