But Who's The Best Man?

Helen Mitternight

I don’t know if this is a genuine trend or just a news gimmick, but did you know you could marry yourself?

Yep, it’s called sologamy, even more mono than monogamy.

People who have done self-commitment ceremonies say it is the ultimate feminist statement, a way of affirming that yes, you and you alone, are enough. No soulmate on the horizon? No problem! You can still have the ceremony, the pomp, the presents. You just marry yourself!

In fact, there’s a website that will sell you a kit that includes a ring for the low, low price of $230 for the ring in trendy rose gold! The site tells you to, “Wear the ring as a symbol of your commitment to yourself and to give you daily reminders that you are fabulous!”

The kit also includes vows because, you know, you want to be sure to promise to never cheat on yourself.

I’m just imagining the wedding march: “Only the Lonely?” or maybe “All By Myself” or “Alone Again, Naturally?”

And the soundtrack for the honeymoon? Isn’t it obvious? I’m thinking the Divinyls’  “I Touch Myself…”