Southern Charm. What We Learned. Episode 1.

Author: 
Hunter Gardner
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I, Hunter Gardner, take to the streets to make sure we’re not all crazy.

 

Well, was it everything you feared? Do you now find yourself suddenly sympathizing with everyone in New Jersey who has to answer to Gym-Tan-Laundry? Thought so.

 

I’m sure we all experienced some kind of spiritual, universal cringe when Whitney Sudler-Smith, a 40-something who seems to have no baring on Charleston whatsoever, called his room (at his parents’ house, where he still lives) his own personal, “stabbin’ cabin” (it physically hurts to write that). And who couldn’t be wooed by T-Rav’s cunning backyard banter when he slyly informs a blonde to his disinterested left that he first learned how to play bocce ball in prison? Charming! 

 

Whether you were mesmerized by Thomas Ravenel’s drunken recreation of Macbeth or his gentlemanly morals that belabored him into bringing a (very hung over) Kathyrn Dennis coffee after a one-night stand (which may or may not have resulted in her becoming pregnant), we're sure that you felt nothing but the upmost rosy feelings towards The Holy City and those who have exploited it for a cheap thrill/political motivations/to pay off gambling debt.

 

While Thomas Ravenel has publically stated that he does not expect the show to encapsulate the typical Charlestonian (which he obviously is not), I still wanted to take to the streets to make sure that I wasn’t a crazy person. I mean sure, no one will probably assume that every Southerner owns a plantation where they regularly play polo, but what about when Thomas Ravenel decided, through a series of conversations with his political consultant (the truly bro’ed-out, Will Folks) and local restaurant owner/spot-on doppelganger of Porky Pig, JD, that he should pursue Kathyrn Dennis because of her historical political ties despite her being half his age. I mean, that’s nuts, right?

We let you, the people, decide.

(Image via Post&Courier)